Lauderdale
Sheriff’s
Office
Last
Friday,
a
20-year-old
man
whose
entire
brand
is
being
better
looking
than
other
people
walked
into
a
Miami-Dade
courtroom
and
met
his
match.
His
name
is
Braden
Peters,
and
he
goes
by
Clavicular
online.
He
did
not
win
the
courtroom
face
card
battle.
Let’s
back
up.
Peters
skyrocketed
to
fame
as
the
poster
child
for
“looksmaxxing”
—
a
subculture
devoted
to
maximizing
attractiveness
using
extreme
measures
including,
in
Peters’s
case,
hitting
himself
in
the
face
with
a
hammer
to
reshape
his
bone
structure,
openly
using
methamphetamine
as
a
weight
loss
tool,
and
injecting
unapproved
substances
into
his
own
face
on
livestream.
He
has
legions
of
followers
on
Instagram,
TikTok
and
Kick.
The
New
York
Times
and
GQ
have
profiled
him.
He
is,
by
his
own
assessment
and
that
of
his
followers,
extremely
good
looking
and
extremely
committed
to
staying
that
way.
Peters
recently
accepted
a
plea
deal
tied
to
a
March
livestream
filmed
in
Florida’s
Everglades,
in
which
Peters
and
another
influencer
repeatedly
fired
shotguns
at
what
appeared
to
be
a
dead
alligator
while
streaming
from
an
airboat
inside
a
protected
wildlife
area.
The
charge:
unlawfully
discharging
a
firearm
in
public.
The
plea:
no
contest.
Peters
and
co-defendant
Andrew
Morales
were
sentenced
to
six
months
of
probation,
20
hours
of
community
service
that
cannot
be
streamed
or
monetized,
a
firearm
safety
class,
and
a
Florida
Fish
and
Wildlife
Conservation
Commission
course.
His
attorney
said
Peters
“accepted
responsibility
for
his
conduct”
and
that
“no
individual
was
injured,
and
the
alligator
involved
was
already
deceased
prior
to
the
events
at
issue.”
Which:
sure,
but
also
you
shot
it
anyway,
many
times,
on
camera,
in
a
protected
wildlife
area.
But
fine.
None
of
that
is
the
story.
The
story
is
the
judge.
Within
hours
of
the
hearing
footage
circulating,
social
media
had
turned
the
courtroom
appearance
into
a
meme
war
centered
almost
entirely
on
the
appearance
of
Miami-Dade
Judge
Marcus
Bach-Armas,
with
thousands
of
posts
claiming
he
had
completely
“judgemogged”
the
20-year-old
streamer
during
the
proceedings.
For
the
uninitiated:
“mogging”
is
manosphere
slang
for
physically
outshining
everyone
around
you.
It
is,
essentially,
the
entire
premise
of
Clavicular’s
brand.
And
the
internet’s
assessment
was
swift
and
unanimous:
the
judge
mogged
him.
Badly.
So
who
is
Judge
Marcus
Bach-Armas?
Glad
you
asked.
He
is,
first
and
foremost,
a
305er
(that
is,
a
Miami
native)
—
born
to
a
mother
whose
family
fled
Communist
Cuba
and
a
father
whose
parents
escaped
Nazi
Germany,
raised
in
Miami,
educated
at
Wesleyan
University
and
the
University
of
Michigan
Law
School.
He’s
a
Biglaw
vet
(Holland
&
Knight)
and
before
taking
the
bench,
he
worked
as
senior
director
of
legal
and
government
affairs
for
the
Miami
Dolphins
and
Hard
Rock
Stadium,
contributing
to
the
Formula
1
Miami
Grand
Prix
and
the
Miami
Open
tennis
complex,
and
has
been
recognized
for
mentorship
work
and
involvement
with
Dolphins
Challenge
Cancer.
He
is
42.
He
has,
per
multiple
independent
assessments
from
the
looksmaxxing
community,
striking
blue
eyes
and
a
chiseled
jawline.
His
social
media
appears
to
be
limited
to
LinkedIn.
Here
at
Above
the
Law
we
cover
judges
a
lot.
We
cover
their
opinions,
their
confirmation
hearings,
their
occasionally
baffling
decisions,
their
sometimes
alarming
social
media
posts.
We
have
not
previously
covered
a
judge
going
viral
because
a
looksmaxxing
influencer’s
fanbase
collectively
decided
he
was
better
looking
than
the
defendant.
There
is
a
first
time
for
everything.
Kathryn
Rubino
is
a
Senior
Editor
at
Above
the
Law,
host
of The
Jabot
podcast,
and
co-host
of Thinking
Like
A
Lawyer.
AtL
tipsters
are
the
best,
so
please
connect
with
her.
Feel
free
to
email her with
any
tips,
questions,
or
comments
and
follow
her
on
Twitter @Kathryn1 or
Bluesky @Kathryn1