List
Would
Above
the
Law
really
publish
a
story
about
a
law
school
dean’s
bio
being
replaced
with
dungeon
porn?
Yeah…
that
tracks.
If
you’ve
spent
any
time
in
the
legal
academy
—
or
even
just
read
our
coverage
of
it
—
you
understand
that
the
annual
U.S.
News
rankings
transformed
law
school
administration
into
a
blood
sport.
The
apotheosis
of
the
joke
that
every
academic
fight
is
so
existentially
fierce
because
the
stakes
are
so
cosmically
meaningless.
The
gap
between
T14
and
the
TTT
matters,
but
schools
mortgaging
integrity
to
move
from
50th
to
45th
makes
makes
college
football
coaches
look
at
deans
and
say,
“the
important
thing
is
that
everyone
has
fun!”
Michael
Orey’s
new
novel,
Dean’s
List,
takes
a
flamethrower
to
that
whole
ecosystem
with
a
glee
that
only
someone
who’s
spent
real
time
inside
the
machine
could
muster.
Orey,
an
adjunct
professor
at
NYU
School
of
Law
and
the
school’s
head
of
public
affairs
since
2010,
has
navigated
egos
and
institutional
PR
for
almost
two
decades.
Before
that,
Orey
worked
as
a
legal
affairs
reporter
and
editor
at
American
Lawyer,
the
Wall
Street
Journal,
and
BusinessWeek.
Dean’s
List
marks
a
foray
into
fiction
after
previously
releasing
Assuming
the
Risk,
a
nonfiction
account
of
tobacco
litigation.
Dean’s
List
follows
Charles
Ogden
Dean
III
—
unfortunately
nicknamed
“Dean
Dean”
—
taking
the
helm
of
a
once-floundering
law
school
newly
rebranded
under
the
prestigious
Brown
University
banner.
Think
Cooley’s
association
with
Western
Michigan,
but
with
Ivy
League
stakes.
Brown
doesn’t
have
a
law
school
—
even
if
the
real-life
Department
of
Defense
doesn’t
realize
it
—
but
the
idea
that
an
Ivy
would
leap
into
the
law
school
business
by
purchasing
an
existing
school
has
been
speculated
before.
Decades
ago,
rumors
swirled
that
Princeton
would
start
a
turnkey
law
school
by
acquiring
NYU
School
of
Law.
That
never
came
to
pass,
but
Orey
envisions
Brown
pulling
off
what
Princeton
couldn’t
by
acquiring
Providence
Law
School
and
pumping
resources
into
a
mad
pursuit
of
Top
5
status.
Along
the
way
are
moral
compromises,
institutional
absurdities,
and
outright
chaos.
A
rogue
nation
bankrolls
a
secret
slush
fund
and
pirates
get
involved,
which
sounds
comically
ridiculous
until
you
remember
Yale
exists.
But
the
heavy
satire
balances
with
authenticity.
The
faculty
grievances,
the
donor
politics,
the
watching
rankings
become
the
golden
calf
that
administrators
worship
all
rings
true
because
Orey
has
been
watching
the
circus
from
inside
the
tent.
It’s
the
kind
of
insider
satire
where
you
laugh
and
then
wince
because
you’ve
seen
some
version
of
every
scene
play
out
in
real
life.
And,
yes,
Above
the
Law
gets
multiple
shout-outs
in
the
book.
Orey
graciously
provided
us
an
excerpt
as
a
preview
for
our
readers.
Complete
with
an
Above
the
Law
mention:
Dean’s
List
is
available
for
pre-order
now.
If
you’ve
ever
worked
in
legal
academia,
survived
a
U.S.
News
ranking
cycle,
or
just
want
to
understand
why
your
dean
looks
like
that,
check
it
out.
And
if
you’re
a
future
military
lawyer,
you’re
apparently
not
allowed
to
attend
the
school
described
in
its
pages
anyway,
so
at
least
you’ll
have
time
to
read
the
book.
Joe
Patrice is
a
senior
editor
at
Above
the
Law
and
co-host
of
Thinking
Like
A
Lawyer.
Feel
free
to email
any
tips,
questions,
or
comments.
Follow
him
on Twitter or
Bluesky
if
you’re
interested
in
law,
politics,
and
a
healthy
dose
of
college
sports
news.
Joe
also
serves
as
a
Managing
Director
at
RPN
Executive
Search.